Forbearance/Forgiveness - Colossians 3: 12 - 17
A Sermon by Alex Evans, Pastor
Second Presbyterian Church, Richmond, VA
Sunday, August 23, 2020
Text: Colossians 3:12-17
Forbearance/Forgiveness
For a long time, my mind and heart have been enriched by the stories and stinging insights of Soren Kierkegaard. Kierkegaard was a 19th century Danish theologian and social commentator. He was very much taken with Christian faith, with the person of Jesus. Yet Kierkegaard spoke harshly about what he saw in life. Lots of people seem to like Jesus, but few people seem truly to follow Jesus.
Here is one of Kierkegaard’s biting stories: a parable of ducks. Kierkegaard describes a town where only ducks live. Every Sunday, the ducks waddle out of their houses and waddle down the street to their duck church. The ducks waddle into their duck sanctuary and squat in their proper pews. The duck choir waddles in and takes its place. The duck minister comes in and opens the duck Bible. And the minister says, “Ducks! God gave you wings! With wings you can fly! With wings you can mount up and soar like eagles! No walls to confine you. No fences can limit you. You have wings and you can fly!”
And all the ducks shouted, “Amen!”
And then they all waddled home. No use of wings, just waddling.
This is Kierkegaard’s way. He tells the story as a challenge to all of us. We keep hearing the good news. We are reminded that we belong to God. We are encouraged to trust and serve God. We even say “Amen.” But then what? (see T. Campolo, Let Me Tell You A Story, p. 80)
Do we just keep waddling along – or are we seeking always to be changed?
We have a great passage today – from Colossians 3. Listen:
12As God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience. 13Bear with one another and, if anyone has a complaint against another, forgive each other; just as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive. 14Above all, clothe yourselves with love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony. 15And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in the one body. And be thankful. 16Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly; teach and admonish one another in all wisdom; and with gratitude in your hearts sing psalms, hymns, and spiritual songs to God.
17And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.
This is the Word of the Lord. Thanks be to God.
This is certainly one of the most succinct and helpful descriptions of what it looks like to live as God’s people.
Theologian and writer, Jonathan Sacks, says something that is very helpful to me about the Bible. The Bible starts with acts done by God – creation, and God claiming and calling a people; God guiding and nurturing a people. God acts for the world and for human beings. And then the Bible story moves – through the ages, and through chapters and stories - to acts done by human beings for the sake and for the glory of God.
This Colossians passage is part of that second part – acts expected and called forth from the people for God – for the betterment of the world and for the glory of God. “Clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, . . . Whatever you do – do it giving thanks to God.” What we are is God’s gift to us. What we become – and how we live – is our gift to God.
At the heart – in the middle of this Colossians passage - is something so much needed, especially in these days: “bear with one another, . . . forgive each other, just as the Lord has forgiven you, so you must also forgive.”
Bearing with one another and forgiving each other has always been central to Christian faith and life. Jesus teaches this over and over. We intend to practice it every Sunday – we seek forgiveness so we can forgive others. But we live in a culture, and especially in a time, when we may just be waddling along – saying our “Amens” . . . and not doing too well at bearing with and forgiving each other.
How do we actually bear with and forgive? And how can we do it better – since it is so important to faithful life? I have been asked this so many times.
- How do we forgive ourselves that moment – some moment - that happened all those years ago, but haunts us like it was yesterday?
- How do I forgive my loved one for the mess he/she is creating in life?
- Maybe it is this: how do I forgive the doctor, or someone else, whose mistake so changed a life, a family?
- Or this - how do I forgive my partner/spouse/friend for the painful betrayal?
Forgiveness is so hard. And, it is not just personal stuff – it can be
communal or national. For example: how do we find forgiveness beyond the years of racial injustice? Who will forgive us for destroying the planet?
Here is the real challenge: how do we get forgiveness off the page as a great idea and aspiration, and make it real and part of our life, our community, our nation?
This Colossians passage is speaking to me in an interesting and helpful way today, especially as we try to do better – be better - at bearing with one another and forgiving each other. The call to bear with one another, and forgive each other, seems to be right in the middle of this passage. But what is on each side of that call to bear with one another and forgive each other seems to help us so much with actually bearing with and forgiving.
The passage starts with important exhortation. “Clothe yourself,” actually “put on,” like clothes, certain traits as God’s chosen ones. We are reminded of our identity – God’s chosen ones – and then urged to clothe ourselves a certain way.
First – “clothe yourself with compassion.” Compassion is an ancient word related to “womb,” as in what a mother feels for the child in her womb. Think about that. Clothe yourselves with compassion – with love and sentiments so deep like a mother’s love for one in her womb.
Compassion, in Latin and Greek, has to do with “suffering with,” having deep empathy for the other. It is the ability to feel the feelings of others. So compassion is feeling for others, but also acting in accord with that feeling. If you really feel another’s pain, you have to act on it. That is compassion.
Then kindness – kindness is tuning your heart to the heart of another. To be kind is to care, with generosity, to offer support, to connect your life to another.
Then humility – humility is realizing that it is not about you, putting yourself second. And meekness only takes it further, not really mildness, but quiet strength – you do not have to have it all your way.
So, here is the point – when we strive sincerely to grow in these important Christian traits - compassion, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience – that is the avenue to bearing with one another and forgiving each other. How do we actually bear with and forgive? Well, we take a step back and focus on compassion – womb-like love and empathy. We seek to extend kindness – support, care, goodness toward others. And we remember humility – our needs and wants come second, . . . or fourth, not first. And we seek patience. Then all of those, I think, allow us to bear with one another and open the door to forgiving each other. We cannot just quickly forgive – forgiveness is hard. But rooted in compassion, kindness, humility and more, we can find our way toward real forgiveness, . . . redeemed relationship, and wholesome life.
And then the words that follow in this passage also help to frame our lives. Here is how The Messagetranslation puts it: 15-17 Let the peace of Christ keep you in tune with each other, in step with each other. None of this going off and doing your own thing. And cultivate thankfulness. Let the Word of Christ—the Message—have the run of the house. Give it plenty of room in your lives. Instruct and direct one another using good common sense. And sing, sing your hearts out to God! Let every detail in your lives—words, actions, whatever—be done in the name of the Master, Jesus, thanking God the Father every step of the way.
We cannot bear with one another, and forgive each other, unless our lives remain centered on God – on God’s peace – not our specific political or personal perspective. Our lives are to be rooted on God’s Word – and letting Scripture shape us. Our lives are to be about encouraging one another in God’s ways, not just pushing through our positions. Our lives are about worshipping God – singing, doing everything, thanking God every step of the way.
Bear with one another – and forgive each other – this is the holy expectation for Christian living. We can be so far from that way. And yet, when we seek to be clothed in compassion, kindness, humility, quiet strength and patience – and also as we align our lives with the peace of Christ, the Word of God, the worship of God – singing, giving thanks, serving – we can bear with and forgive, . . . and inch closer to the life God intends for us.
Some of you recall the name, Gregory Boyle. He is the Jesuit priest who has devoted his life to helping the poor, drug-infested, dangerous gangs in Los Angeles with his Homeboy Industries. Boyle has also written two great books about his life and ministry, which I have mentioned before. Boyle says that, in his work with gangs, he has been often criticized for “coddling” gang members, you know, “coddling” as opposed to “rigorous rehabilitation.” But in his lifetime of work with these troubled youth, seeking to save their lives and bring them into the light, he says that he merely tries to foster an “irresistible culture of tenderness.”
What a great phrase – “an irresistible culture of tenderness.” He strives for a steady, harmonizing love that will infiltrate the whole place at Homeboy Industries. (G Boyle, Barking . . , p. 122)
Not everything happens because of tenderness. Justice often does not happen via tenderness. Systemic improvements in racial disparities do not get solved by tenderness. But a whole lot of life – and especially bearing with one another, and forgiving each other – is going to be rooted in tenderness.
In so much of life, we are a long way from tenderness. As we bear with one another and forgive each other, we get closer to what God has in mind for us. Tenderness may not come quickly in some broken parts of life that need forgiveness, but the more we can nurture tenderness, the quicker we can find the wholeness of forgiveness. Tenderness is what we see in Jesus on the cross: “Father, forgive them.” Tenderness is certainly something that will change us in all our relationships. More tenderness in our connections, in our interpersonal encounters, in our hearts – will guide us toward bearing with and forgiving.
An irresistible culture of tenderness. Think how that would change you – and change our world – toward wholeness and faithfulness and life as God intends. May it be so. AMEN
Prayer of Commitment: Holy God, cover our lives with your Spirit, and inspire us in the ways of compassion, kindness, and grace, so we can indeed find our way toward forgiveness and tenderness, and find life in Christ our Lord. Amen
Alex W. Evans, Pastor, Second Presbyterian Church, Richmond, VA preached this sermon during Sunday morning worship on August 23, 2020. This is a rough manuscript.